I’ve struggled with depression since my early teens. I have a form of bi-polar disorder that leans toward the depressive side. I have manias that get me into trouble and I take unnecessary risks, but my biggest challenge is depression.
I’ve been self-managing it for the past 8 or 9 years, but in the past few weeks, months, I’ve felt myself sinking. I finally got to a point where I didn’t want to get out of bed. In healthier times, I made a checklist of when to seek help, and I’d filled that checklist right on up. I saw a doctor a few weeks ago and got back on anti-depressants.
But I know from experience, medication isn’t enough. All through my life, art and literature has saved me over and over.
I keep a visual journal and since February 4, I’ve re-committed myself to a daily draw. And to help me stay on task, I’ve decided to post my progress.
Several friends have urged me to share my journals more widely, but I have this nagging feeling that they’re too self-indulgent. Is that those negative voices (you know the itty-bitty-shitty-committee) stopping me from acting on good ideas? Well, I guess if what I post is too trite, you can look away.
It always helps me, though, to see how other people cope with mental conditions and health.
I haven’t decided whether to post daily or weekly, so I thought I’d start with weekly.
Let me know what you think.